Why Do We Come Back To Unhealthy Habits, Beliefs and People?
Did you ever wonder why some people continue indulging in unhealthy habits that truly hurt them? Why they keep coming back to them?
Maybe few times you were on that road too. Hey, no judgement! It is fine, Queen, because I can certainly raise my hand to that too. We all can.
Though, at the same time, this behaviour seems quite weird, doesn't it? In the end, why would we enjoy hurting ourselves?
We keep coming to unhealthy habits, unhealthy beliefs, unhealthy people that treat us with pain just because it is familiar.
Yes, somehow our precious brain sarcastically finds comfort in that discomfort.
You see, our brain's main purpose is to make us safe. It sounds a little weird that our brain might find unhealthy habits safe. Yet, if these habits have been going in your life for a long time e.g: from childhood, that becomes familiar to your brain.
Anytime you indulge in something different - it gets confused,because those things are unfamiliar.
Good news is that it means that our brain is not that complicated after all. It just puts all the things into boxes labelled "familiar" and "unfamiliar". (This definition was firstly mentioned by hypnotherapist Marisa Peer. Check this amazing women out, she is doing some kick-ass work breaking psychology and therapy myths.)
So actually all the phrases "IT IS DIFFICULT" and "IT IS HARD" is not truly real. It is not hard and it is not difficult, it is just unfamiliar.
We simply need to ask ourselves : WHAT IS FAMILIAR FOR ME, BUT DOES NOT TRULY SERVE ME?
Because you can turn your familiar to unfamiliar and unfamiliar to familiar, but that requires your awareness and your desire with action.
No one is saying that it will be easy, Queen. Changing brain patterns always requires work. But it is possible. By you showing up, over and over again.
Let me show you how it works with my own personal story:
I used to be a big sugar chocolate addict...if you can even call most of the chocolate sweets chocolate ( they contain more butter and other substances than chocolate).
In fact, I was called "The Chocolate Queen" in the university, cause during breaks I always went to buy at least one bar of chocolate. I truly could eat a huge box of chocolate at once without much problems. And believe me, sharing wasn't really an option.